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Field Day for the Sundays

I wanna be a field day for the Sundays so they can f**k up my life
Embarass my wife, and leave a bad taste
That striped toothpaste can't remove on Monday mornings
I wanna be a target for the dailies so they can show
Pictures of me with a nude on page three, so lacking in taste
Touched up near the waist, looking as limp as Monday morning